How long do you have to write a thank you note for a wedding gift?

One of the most popular wedding etiquette questions we get from newly married couples is “How long do we have to write a thank you for our wedding gift?” Let’s start by debunking a common myth – the happy couple doesn’t have a whole year! Instead, it’s ideal to send all thank-you notes within three months of receiving the gift. To make it easier, try setting a daily goal and jotting down a response on the very day you receive a wedding gift. This way, you won’t end up with a mountain of notes to write after the wedding!

If you receive a wedding gift ahead of the wedding day, the guidelines remain the same- thank you notes should be sent within three months of receiving the gift. Just remember, a marital monogram is only used following the official wedding, so if you send thank-you cards ahead of the big day, use a simple thank you card rather than your post-nuptial newly monogrammed stationery.

Traditionally, wedding thank-you cards should be mailed in a timely manner, and that year-long window is a misconception. The sweet spot is immediately up to three months. The three-month guideline should give you plenty of time to order, write, address, sign, seal, and deliver the notes without feeling overwhelmed. It may take a bit of organizing and prioritizing, but your guests won’t be left wondering if you received it, or wonder if you forgot your manners.

If you have what feels like an overwhelming amount to write, don’t take on the task alone or try to tackle it all at once. Break it down into smaller, manageable tasks, and set daily goals for the number of notes you’ll complete. And don’t forget to share the “work” with your partner – teamwork makes the process much smoother! That being said, if one of the couple chooses to write all of them by themselves, one option is for each partner within the couple to sign their name at the bottom to make it feel as though it comes from both!

Now, when it comes to stationery, we recommend keeping it a bit more traditional and thoughtful. While a casual BBQ invitation can be acknowledged with a thank-you email, for weddings, we recommend using formal stationery to match the special occasion. Skip the fill-in-the-blank cards, generic messages from your wedding website, pre-printed notes, phone calls, or even emails. Personal stationery or store-bought thank-you cards work best because they match the formality of the occasion. Hand-written stationery also is a tangible thank-you card that shows extra effort and will leave a lasting etiquette-approved impression.

Lastly, remember to add a personal touch to your thank-you notes. Share heartfelt sentiments and make each one as personal as possible. Keep a list of all your gifts and write down next to it who it was from so that you’re not left thanking someone for the wrong gift. Writing a hand-written thank you note for your wedding gift is not only a beautiful way to show your gratitude, but will make the recipient feel truly special and appreciated too!

Read more about what to wear to every type of wedding here!